1. This one is sad. I got out of archaeology and into teaching high school largely because my area of expertise was utterly unmarketable.

  2. For several years, I was one of the world’s greatest experts on street dirt. Don’t pretend. I know you are jealous. I SO want this badge.

  3. I am in fact the God of Tadpole Hearing.

    You may kiss my lateral line. Which has nothing to do with hearing. But only I would know that.

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